birthdays and anniversaries

Before i start today I have to wish my best friend a very happy BELATED birthday “Happy birthday Ambu” (OOPS Amritha thats her real name… Ambu is her pet name). The reason i am doing this is because i forget about birthdays and anniversaries. The worst part of the whole episode is that she and her hubby actually bet that i would not remember…. BUT I DID CALL HER YESTERDAY….no guesses who won it!!! thanks sumitran for being positive and still having faith that i would remember her birthday. I am really hoping that you cashed into it big time. Ambu has already given up on me though she does not really blame me…. guess I actually get away with it!!! Me forgetting birthdays is almost legendary!!!! nobody expects otherwise!!!

Coming back to birthdays and anniversaries…. i never remember them!!! I remember them maybe a day or two days before or after never on the day. Every year I remember shamita’s birthday a week earlier and then a couple of days later on March 24th or 25Th. Same with Kunjan’s on April 12Th…. when i remember that Nisha’s birthday is over on the 10Th, and Naushad’s and Kunjan’s birthday’s are on the consecutive days on 17Th and 18Th April….. I again remember that i missed them on the 20Th. Its not that I don’t remember birthdays I do remember them…. like I know that Manju’s birthday is in the month of January and so is Poornima’s and Jubi’s (They are friends of mine from school I met them again last year…. thanks to Orkut.) Still I do remember their birthdays after all this time…. what i dont remember is their birthday on that very day. My brain keeps giving me a tinkle all the time but i just don’t remember what it is!!!

Over a period of time I have learnt to cover up by actually sending ecards well in advance to everybody on my mailing list that way people don’t accuse me of forgetting and when they call up to thank me, it takes a couple of seconds to remember when i did that, and then I am so proud of myself. The only anniversary that i don’t forget is that of my parents THAT i never do….. OK i think i did once!!! maybe twice!!! but i really have a fabulous sister. I know it does not compensate the fact that i forget but believe me she is so great…. that she reminds me of any family birthday or anniversary….. including her own…… she does it in the morning and so i very stoically call up the person and wish them and get stuff like “oh you remembered!!!”

Last year i forgot my oldest sister’s birthday though Chodidi did remind me about it. You know i was going to work and was in the 8:10 harbour local and had to get down at Kurla (anybody from mumbai travelling by train would know what I am talking about)and then i forgot!!!….. so i called Bodidi at night…. OK it was a little late…. 12:00 actually!!!…. you know my brain remembered that i was missing something…. (I do have a fabulous brain after all….. [Smita will agree with me {about the brain}])….. she screamed at me and told me to get lost!!! and that the day was over…. what happened to THANK YOU??? I DID call!!! I REMEMBERED!!! the day is not over yet!!! I guess Ambu is the only one who truly understands me because I think for all her birthdays she has only received belated cards from me and she never holds it to me. Ain’t she fabulous!!! all my friends are after all I still have lots of them in spite of my handicap.

As far as birthdays of friends are concerned I totally rely on Christy she is impeccable….. she remembers all the birthdays and anniversaries and reminds me either via orkut or via sms and then i send them a birthday wish…… but Christy… darling what about your birthday….. guess i have to get Sag to remind me about that!!! He does not know about my disability i guess!!! whatever christy you are the best !!! The classic case of me never remembering birthdays is of Vicky….. I never ever remembered his birthday in my whole life….. and i DID once. Man was he shocked !!!!

Chodidi is a total antithesis of me. She not only remembers everybody’s birthdays but also their anniversaries including the birthdays of cousins and their WIVES and HUSBANDS…. can you beat that!!! The other day we were talking and she remembered that it was the birthday of some character Sanjay banerjee, with whom we had travelled in train on our way to kolkata…. and guys…… that was more than two decades ago…..That is not all…. she even remembers the birthdays and death anniversaries of bollywood actors and actresses…. even deceased ones. When we are in a conversation, she suddenly comes up with “You know today is Amitabh’s birthday. He is a libran and tomorrow is Rekha’s birthday” and that Jaya bacchan is a “xyz sign” and her birthday is on “00 abcd” or mukesh’s birthday…. she does not even like him and thinks that he sings with his nose!!! still she remembers his birthday and also that of Rafi and lots of others like him who are fossils by now, and for that matter who remembers some person’s birthday, whom you have met once in your life for one day and he is not even your friend, and you didn’t even have a crush on him (I am talking about the elusive Sanjay Banerjee)

She has a weird way of remembering them. She adds it to their names in her cell like Ranu 6th november, Rajdeep 13th jan. That is the surname that she gives to us. In the quest for a solution to my handicap, i did try that (I try everything) but even though Ambu 22ND Oct and Pankaj 10Th October….. I never managed to remember it on those days. Guess i should check my cell more. My sis says that it is her way of JUST confirming that she was right. It does not work for me. The other day she called me and told me “wish me!!! it is my birthday” and another day “today is dada’s (her hubby) birthday” and another day “today is Payal’s (her daughter) birthday” and then she hands the phone to them…. I mean i am ashamed of myself. I have only two nieces and i cant remember their birthdays or which class they are in. I know i only cant remember it when asked. Sometimes people think I don’t really like them but man if you see my nieces you will understand how lovely they are and who wouldn’t love them……. but you know i cant make them understand that it is a handicap!!! something like dyslexia!!! I wish I knew the psychobabble for it!!!

I even tried reminders but then that fell off as well when i accidently text the electrician who had the same name as my friend and who was more than pleased to find a lady texting him. (If u see my cell u will be amazed that i have the numbers of every shop restaurant and service provider listed from my vicinity so much for my organising skills) I am really disgusted with myself and more than anything else i am filled with remorse and hate the fact that I can’t remember things that are so simple…. people who really know me….. understand this about me. My sis knows that i really torture myself about it in the ensuing days so she covers up for me. I guess that is what families are for….. Thanks Chodidi!!! and thanks Christy!!! you guys make life really simple for me.

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